The Friday Funny: Measurement conversions

For those new to metrics – and as the sizes of computer hard drives increase astronomically each year – it can be hard to stay on top of all that “giga-this” and “terra-that” terminology. Here’s a helpful guide that’s done the rounds on the Internet (we found it at Michelle’s Joke Vault):

1. Ratio of an igloo’s circumference to its diameter: Eskimo Pi
2. 2000 pounds of Chinese soup: Won ton
3. 1 millionth of a mouthwash: 1 microscope
4. Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement: 1 bananosecond
5. Weight an evangelist carries with God: 1 billigram
6. Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour: Knot-furlong
7. 365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it’s less filling: 1 lite year
8. Half of a large intestine: 1 semicolon
9. 1000 aches: 1 megahurtz
10. Basic unit of laryngitis: 1 hoarsepower
11. Shortest distance between two jokes: A straight line (think about it for a moment)
12. 453.6 graham crackers: 1 pound cake
13. 1 million-million microphones: 1 megaphone
14. 1 million bicycles: 2 megacycles
15. 365.25 days: 1 unicycle
16. 2000 mockingbirds: two kilomockingbirds
17. 10 cards: 1 decacards
18. 1 kilogram of falling figs: 1 Fig Newton
19. 1000 grams of wet socks: 1 literhosen
20. 1 millionth of a fish: 1 microfiche
21. 1 trillion pins: 1 terrapin
22. 10 rations: 1 decoration
23. 100 rations: 1 C-ration
24. 2 monograms: 1 diagram
25. 2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital: 1 I.V. League

We also found some more gems to add the list on alphaDictionary.com:

26. 1 dialog = 2 monologs
27. 5 dialogs = 1 decalog
28. 8 nickels = 2 paradigms
29. 2 wharves = 1 paradox
30. 1 million billion picolos = 1 gigolo
31. 10 millipedes = 1 centipede
32. 3 1/3 tridents = 1 decadent
33. 10 cards = 1 decacards
34. One acre = 43,560 square feet = a lotsa toes
35.  4 lawyers = 2 paralegals
36. 2 untruths = 1 paralyze
37. All perjured testimony in a gov’t coverup = 1 scandalize

Got any more to add?

Comments are closed.