The Friday Funny: We don’t need no open tenders …

The recent anzea (Aotearoa New Zealand Evaluation Association) conference in Wellington had a great turnout, and of course a fun conference dinner. Our friend and colleague, Kataraina Pipi required each table at the dinner to compose and perform an item.

Here’s a song that came from one table … giving both the client and evaluator perspectives on the joys of open tender processes and evaluation reporting …

We don’t need no open tenders
We don’t need no cost control
No dark all-nighters meeting deadlines
Hey, commissioners*, leave that GETS** alone!
All in all it’s just a waste of time for us all

We don’t need no phonebook milestones***
We don’t need no weighty tomes
We don’t need no random diatribes
Hey, researchers, leave our work alone!
All in all it’s just a waste of time for us all

We just need some good commissioners*
Evaluators with a clue
Maybe even silo spanning
Hey, anzea, we’re talking ’bout all of you!
All in all it’s just a great win-win for us all

 

* commissioners – used in NZ to refer to clients, those who commission evaluations

** GETS – Government Electronic Tenders Service, the place where all the government sector tenders are posted

*** phonebook milestones – reference to telephone book-sized contract milestone reports that have been painstakingly written, largely unread, and seldom used

3 comments to The Friday Funny: We don’t need no open tenders …

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